Connection. That's the priority in our homes and our homeschools. This was the most valuable insight I got from the Brave Writer retreat last week. Julie has six ways to foster connection. "The 6 C's of Connection."
The first and most important C is Compassion, and this is the one I chose to work on first. Before I even had a chance to be more aware of my own feelings of compassion for my family, I became aware of their compassion for me. From having my food ready when I got home to my husband staying home with me when I had a migraine and he really needed to get some things done to my daughter ironing my clothes when I was feeling bad.
In fact, tonight I was noticing compassion for me from people outside my family. I was at church waiting for my teens at a youth activity, and I mentioned that my car air conditioner wasn't working and I was going to have to pay a lot to have it fixed. There were a couple dads there, and they looked at it for me and told me what they thought I should try first. So I said thanks and went home. But when I got home, there was a message on my phone from one of them saying he had called another of the dads who is an amazing mechanic. He said the other guy had time to look at the car tonight and find out what it needs. So I went over (I had never even met him) and he found out what I needed, we ordered the part, and he's fixing it this weekend. I can't believe how much gratitude I feel for these men. They could have just said, "Oh, that's terrible not to have air conditioning in this heat." But they did something about it. Compassion.
That's going to save me like $1000! I know that the connection with these people isn't the same as we have in a family, but it is still noticeable to me. That's how friendships are made. Don't we want that friendship feeling inside our home? It works the same way.
So how have I increased my compassion? I'm becoming more aware of how my kids feel. To think of it as if I were feeling it. Because at some point, I have felt it. Haven't we all?
On Thursday night at the retreat, we did line dancing. I've never done it before, and it was hard to remember all the steps of each dance and what to do next. Really hard. It made me have more compassion for my Sam who's 13. He can do tons of math in his head, but I think I've mentioned before that the procedures seem impossible for him to remember. I felt like Sam, like it was impossible for me to remember. And I had music and movement on my side. As I was more aware of exactly how he felt--more than just knowing it in my head--my love for him and connection to him increased. I want that to happen in all our family relationships. Every day!
Check back for more on the 6 C's.
See you tomorrow!
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